Wednesday, August 18, 2010

No one knows


I just got back from uni, was performing my tarawikh at Multi Faith Centre. Alhamdulillah, another one blessed night. =)

Fasting over here honestly, not much of a problem. I don't really feel the burden to resist temptation when people are eating in front of me, or the aroma of hot chocolate gushed into my nostril. Because you used to it. 

So, how is that? Most of the time even before Ramadhan started, we often eat at home after the classes end. Or tapau food for lunch if classes end late on that day. We used to 'starve' during lunch hour and have our meal later on that day.

Ok it is not starve, that sounds harsh. Haha.. We postpone our lunch (aka skip lunch la sonang cito eh..) So, when Ramadhan comes, it's not a big deal for me. Because you used to berperut kosong.

Plus, it's hard to get halal food around campus. So when you see someone is enjoying a hot drumstick or pizza, your saliva won't secrete (oke, terover plak gune perumpamaan air liur di situ..) because you know that food is not halal.

And plus2, it's winter now! Meaning that, day time is shorter than Malaysia's, aka break fast early! =P (X sempat rase lapar kot.. Hehe..)

Whether you are fasting or you are not fasting (due to menstrual reason la kn?) no one will ever know. Nobody will arrest you if you are eating publicly during Ramadhan. No one will say, "Eh, x puase ke?" if you mistakenly drank in class.

Because people around you do not know what's fasting is all about. Fasting in the country where Muslims are the minority, you can even skip the whole Ramadhan la if you want. But, be honest to yourself, because verily Allah knows. He said,

"And indeed We have created man, and We know what his own self whispers to him. And We are nearer to him than his jugular vein (by Our Knowledge)" [50:16]
"And He knows whatever there is in the land and in the sea; not a leaf falls, but He knows it. There is not a grain in the darkness of the earth nor anything fresh or dry, but is written in a Clear Record" [6:59]

Hatta daun - daun gugur pun Allah tahu, ape tah lagi insan - insan yang tak puase kn? Only you and Him, Allah the All-Knower know about it.

Today I had a 2-hour class from 5pm to 7pm. That class was totally clash with the Maghrib prayer, so I did jama' Maghrib with Isya'. Then, I straight away continue with the tarawikh prayer. I only managed to break fast properly with heavy meal after that (nasib baik perut tak grumbling time sembahyang...) I can choose to walk and make my way home pretending I've done with the tarawikh congregation. No one will ever know. Tapi hidup mahu jujur la beb!

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